As I'm sure most people do, I went into marriage with a few desires and expectations for how I envisioned our first year of marriage to be. I think a lot of couples plan to spend their first year of marriage doing things like traveling the world or buying a new house or making babies. Now that I'm almost three months into this whole marriage thing I can say it's not totally as I expected. I'm not gonna lie there have been a few disappointments.
Last year at this time I had imagined that our first summer together as newlyweds would be full of fun little adventures. Since we wouldn't be devoting so much time to planning and money to saving for the wedding we would be free to do things like take little weekend trips to the beach or other cool spots we had never been to before. We would go to some fun outdoor concerts or wineries and have a date night at least once a week. I also thought we would be looking for a new, larger place to live.
Well, unfortunately, none of those things have really happened. What I didn't know or expect last year was that despite not having a wedding to save for we would still be on a very tight budget due to Kristian having a new 100% commission only type of job. Without a steady paycheck it makes it very hard to have a set budget or feel the freedom to splurge. So we haven't been on any weekend trips, or to any concerts and instead of looking to move somewhere larger we might actually have to downsize to save some money.
I must admit it's been frustrating and disappointing. It doesn't help to see constant updates and pictures on Facebook of other married couples my age taking fancy trips or buying new cars. Yeah I have a bit of green-eyed monsteritis at times.
But then I take a breath, kick my own ass and remind myself of what I do have which is a fantastic husband who loves me more than words can say, who tells me how beautiful I am daily, who puts up with my horrible taste in reality t.v. and obsession with celebrity gossip, who does the gross chores that I don't want to do like taking out the garbage and cleaning the litter boxes, who cooks for me almost every night and who goes out in the pouring rain to get me the mac n cheese that I'm craving.
And then I remember that I'm pretty damn lucky because despite not having these various material things that I so covet I have the one thing that I've really always wanted and prayed for and that's a wonderful, loving husband.
The fact is we have (hopefully) very long lives ahead of us in which to do all these things- take amazing trips and buy a house, it doesn't all need to be done the first 3 months we're married. I waited 28 years to find Kristian I don't need everything to happen immediately, if it did what would we have to look forward to?