Thursday, June 16, 2011

Holy Budget Buster

After hearing and reading about how a lot of daycares have ridiculously long waiting lists (and being the freak planner that I am) I have already started looking into potential daycares for next year. Unfortunately neither Kristian nor I make enough to support one of us quitting our jobs to stay home full time with the baby so daycare it is.

Last night we took a tour and met with the director of a daycare that is very close to our house. Overall we both really like the facility and how they operate. We got there towards the end of the day so there weren't many infants still left but the ones that were there all seemed very happy and well taken care of. We met with one of the infant teachers who seemed very nice. For the most part I really liked the place and the location is perfect because it's right off a main street that we both have to travel to and from work so we would not need to go out of our way in the opposite direction and make our already long commutes even longer. More than likely I would drop off in the morning and Kristian would pick up in the afternoons since he's typically done with work by 3pm.

Then of course we get to the pricing part of this deal which I already knew would be expensive and I was not wrong. It fell in the range I was expecting yet I stupidly hoped maybe it would be less and I would have a nice surprise. Not so much. I'm already mentally recalculating our budget and trying to figure out how to make this work. Now if we could somehow work it so that the kid only needs to go 3 days a week rather than 5 we would save a good bit of money because that's when the price break starts. So we plan to see if one or both of our mothers could take a day each week to watch the baby and perhaps see if one of our bosses would let us work from home one day a week. We have a lot to figure out.

In the meantime I still want to check out a few more places to compare before making a final decision.

On another note I need to rant for a minute--- this morning I posted on FB about how expensive daycares are and most of the comments I've gotten so far have been very supportive except for one from a girl that I know is a stay at home who wrote something along the lines of "I hope once the baby comes you'll want to stay home with him" umm EXCUSE ME?! As if I don't WANT to stay home with my child. What a huge assumption to make! Obviously I would love to be able to stay home with my child but despite the high cost of daycare it's not more than what either of us make at work and there is no way we could afford to live on one salary.

So I very nicely responded that I would love to stay home with my child but that's not a financial option for us at the moment. Ugh. I won't even tell you what I REALLY wanted to say to her.

Here's the thing I have nothing against daycare, both my husband and I went to daycare and we turned out alright. And even if I could stay home with my kid I would probably still want to send him to daycare one or two days a week so they could learn to socialize with other kids, learn to share and so that I could have that time to do my errands. Daycare isn't the devil. If you can afford to stay home with your kid that's fantastic, I envy you. Unfortunately I cannot.


Brittney said...

Have you looked into in-home daycare options? I've started looking around a little bit (and I'm not even pregnant... I may be the bigger "freak" lol), and even the licensed places seem to be a bit less expensive. A friend of mine also suggested contacting local churches and seeing if they could recommend a member who does child care in their home (like, a SAHM who needs the extra $$).

bananas. said...

don't take it personal...there's always a snotty mother who like to put her two cents in. you can only do so much and hello you're only human! a human who has to work at that!

btw i think it's great that you're planning ahead. i know a lot of people who wait til the last second and then end up hating the daycare they choose.

Mrs EyeCanSee said...

As a working mom who's often riddled with self imposed daycare mom guilt...I must admit I saw that FB comment and wanted to smack a hoe. But I didn't know who she was, and I'm not all into starting drama so I restrained myself. Some people can be so rude!

We love Jamie's daycare! While I wish he didn't have to go full time, I think I would always send him at least a day or two. I feel like he gets so bored at home with me!

Kristen said...

what a crappy FB comment!

I am just starting to look at daycares, and I am not gonna lie, the whole thing freaks me out so I keep putting it off. I was a day care kid and ended up fine, but I know I am going to have major Mommy guilt and will probably make Josh do the drop off (I mean I have a hard time leaving the dog home all day...).

I too would love to stay home, we haven't run the numbers yet, but regardless I am with you for sending kinds to daycare or some kind of "school" for socialization purposes. I think it is REALLY important and kids enjoy being with other kids.

Glad your first look at a daycare went well, it makes me feel more optimistic about my search.

Speaking of which, I better get on that...

d.a.r. said...

Wow. I hate how judgmental some people are!! I have no intention to stay at home with my baby. Does that make me a shitty neglectful mom? I sure hope not. And, really, why is it anyone else's business aside from myself and my husband?!?

And yeah...daycare is freaking expensive. Might as well have a second mortgage!

Meg said...

That was a stupid comment that the girl made! You are way nicer then I would have been! We luckily have my friend who is a stay at home mom offer to watch our baby--granted I'll pay her (I'm thinking $12 an hour). We all do what we've got to do and how dare her to make that judgement!

Marian said...

Seriously, I should look into starting a daycare business with how expensive it is!! And you know, I would have been a tad perturbed as well had someone commented on my status with that!!

Bicoastal Bride said...

The high costs of daycare are outrageous, especially in DC and the surrounding areas. I know it's difficult for so many parents. I totally agree that not everyone has the means to get by with just a single income and people shouldn't just assume that it's an option!

april said...

Oh, just wait. That's the problem with women. There are always a few who are quick to judge about anything.

We are lucky in that my mother-in-law watches Laura for free though we did supply a lot in the beginning. I would be prepared for anything. A supplier's child is allergic and got sick from all the other kids at daycare. It cost less for them to hire a nanny than pay for all the prescriptions and time off from work. There are a lot of germs in daycare and school, but most kids overcome that in the first year. Laura's first year of school, we've all gotten sick at least once a month.

The socialization is huge though. Laura still isn't very social to kids not related to her. She's very big into independent play, but she's branching out. I think she'll play more in the next year or two with the kids from school.

Hopefully, you'll have more options with work to spend time at home. I'm the type of mommy who needs to have adult interaction, and I have no mommy guilt over that at all. I don't think I've have enough patience and motivation to be a stay at home mom. Once they hit 6-9 months or so, it's more difficult to work at home and care for a baby though - they're into everything and crawling and are very vocal, but I used to love working from home when Laura was an infant. She'd hang in the bassinet and look up at me while I worked. Nice way to keep direct mail into perspective.

bekapaige said...

Daycare is definitely expensive! It's true what someone commented above, I looked at some in-home daycares and they were quite a bit cheaper. You just don't have backups in case the daycare provider is sick- there's give and take for everything in life. I'm so glad that the daycare next to your house is good! We have one right next to us, but the one I think I would like more is a ways down the road... bleh :)

Judgment sucks. And I say that as someone who judges for a hobby :) No but really, if your family is taken care of, then that is all that matters, mrs judgey mcjudgerson! :)