Tuesday, September 27, 2011

What's in a Name?

I am now officially less than 3 months from my due date! And while a lot of people have their child's name picked out as soon as they find out the gender (or get that positive pregnancy test) I must admit our child is still nameless.

Yes we've discussed names, in fact there is one name that we both like and is the current front runner, however I seem to be completely commitment-phobic when it comes to choosing this little guy's name. Even though I do like the name we've discussed I'm still not 100% sold on it and feel like maybe there is a better name out there that I just haven't heard or considered yet. In addition to a couple names I do actually like better but would need to persuade Kristian on.

Naming a kid is hard. At least for me it is. There is just so much to consider. Firstly you need to make sure the name doesn't have any obvious, God-awful, mean nicknames attached to it. I also want a name that is transitional and will be cute for a little boy but also cool for a teenager and then professional when he's an adult. There are a ton of really cute little kid names but then when you imagine them as a 40 year old adult the names are just too cutesy and young sounding. Oh and of course you need to make sure that your partner likes the name too, which is easier said than done.

So to be honest I don't know if our kids name will be 100% decided before he gets here. And here's the thing, even if it is chosen before he arrives we aren't telling anyone the name (this is driving my MIL CRAZY!!!). We aren't sharing the name or even ones we're actively considering for a few reasons:

1. It's hard enough for us to agree on a name without having to factor in other people's positive or negative opinions. Whenever we do finally decide on a name I don't want us to question our choice if someone doesn't like the name. Once babies are here most people keep their mouths shut in regards to disliking a name.

2. I, personally, find it more exciting to find out the name when the kid is born. Especially if everyone already knows the gender, keeping the name a secret adds a little bit to the anticipation for family and friends. Plus it's fun to have something to torture our parents with ;-)

3. I want the option to change the name at the last minute. This goes back to my commitment phobia about the name. Once you announce the name (prior to the birth) people have a tendency to start buying personalized items for the baby, which is awesome, unless you decide at the last minute to change the name for whatever reason. Then you could be stuck with a lot of clothes that say Alex when you end up with a Joe. Now if you're one of those people that knows beyond a shadow of a doubt what you want the name to be then buy away but again I just don't think I'm one of those people.

So that's where we stand with the name for those that are wondering.

For those with kids already, did you have the name picked out before the baby arrived?

Did/Will you keep the baby's name a surprise until it's born?

15 comments:

mrs.mfc said...

We have names narrowed down a bit. Two or three are really in the lead right now. I WANT to share the name with everyone once we decide but I like the idea of waiting until the baby arrives. Not so much because I want the option of changing my mind, but just as a fun surprise. The negative to that is people not knowing and not being able to buy personalized stuff. We could buy all the personalized stuff we want but we'll have to keep it hidden away. I know that would absolutely drive our parents insane!!! Hahaha!! Naming a child is a HUGE deal and I also have commitment issues so I understand :)

C and J said...

ok longtime reader but first time commentor.... :) i am 16 weeks pg with my second child (another boy) and a war has broken out in our house in regards to names. of course we agreed on a girl name right away but can't seem to come to any kind of compromise on boy names. i don't remember having this much trouble naming my first son. i feel like i have searched every book and website under the sun and can't find something that i just love. it is so frustrating.

KLaw said...

you're killing me! however, i know now how you felt last year when i was being a pain in the ass about Smith's name.

Marian said...

Sounds like a good plan to me. Sometimes its the baby that picks the name!!

BG said...

people's opinions suck! we just finally decided to disregard everyone's opinion and go for it. who cares what other people think? i know it's hard though.

i completely support your decision to keep it secret (for what that's worth ;)) and i'm sure whatever you two choose will fit him just perfectly. :)

Kristen said...

We obviously have our name picked before baby comes, and are sharing it. But, I think it is totally up to the couple. You are right, when you tell people the name it makes them think that it is up for debate, or that they can share thier opinion!

Plus it will be nice to have the option to change it once you meet him, just in case!

Saying I do said...

I really like your idea to keep the baby's name a secret until he arrives...and your reasonings are so true...people will express all sorts of opinions and make your question your decision. I like the element of surprise too!

My one friend has had her boy and girl names picked out since she was in High School and is already set on her future children's names...I am NOT like that and will be exactly like you. I know that picking a name will be a challenge for me and my husband one day. Good luck and I can't wait to see what name you pick!!

april said...

We picked the name within a week of finding the gender. I'm still not sold on it, but it proved easy for her to spell, and I don't dislike the name. We had the middle name immediately so had to fit a first name with the middle and last name. We told the family pretty much as soon as we settled on it and told them up front it was final so no bitching. It turned out everyone liked it (plus, we had bantered around names we knew they didn't like first to lower the expectations). I thought it was easier to connect with the baby once she had a name.

I don't mind not knowing the name. I am completely impatient waiting to find a gender.

Nicole-Lynn said...

I can definitely see where you're coming from! Having it be a surprise sounds fun!

I'm one of those freaks that has known what my future little girls name would be for a while, so I know as soon as we're expecting everything will have her new monogram! ha! But if we have a boy, I'm screwed. We're still undecided on a boy name! :)

Dani said...

We have a boy name picked out, but we can't agree on a girl name at all! So we aren't even going to talk about girl names until after our 20 week scan. No point in arguing about it if we have a boy anyway!

We are keeping the name a secret until they are born, too.

Brittney said...

We're keeping our name options secret for the exact same reasons... my family/friends don't seem to understand it, but they aren't in my shoes with a lot of family/friends with a lot of opinions and not a lot of tact! lol

Heather said...

I already know I'll have a hard time settling on a name for my kids, too, when the day comes. Like you said, it's a challenge to choose a name that will be great when the child's young but also as an adult.

Lexilooo said...

I don't blame you at all for wanting to keep the baby's name a secret! When I have babies, I don't want to know the gender before they are born, but if the boy insists that we find out, I'd keep the name a secret for sure. Like you said, people's opinions never help at all!

beka said...

I don't think there is anything wrong with keeping the name a secret - I have friends who have done that because they didn't want opinions on their name choice. I don't know if I would be able to keep it a secret because I suck at secret... I always tell :) But I think, especially if you guys aren't sure what the final name choice will be, keeping it a secret may be a good idea!

Meg said...

Nope, I think we will definitely spill the beans on our bean's name once we get preggo and know the gender. I mean I just love monogrammed stuff and would love some a presents, lol. :)